Naples National Golf Course the site of the Koch Partners annual guys golf trip

Three years ago my satisfaction with ‘friends’ on the Seven Fs was discouragingly low.  My son had the nerve to grow up, go to college and leave me without my daily guy-fix.  The three women left at home didn’t understand.  The culture at my workplace was deteriorating and my emotional stability mirrored the stock market.  It helped to know I wasn’t alone in my feelings of isolation. A colleague beautifully stated the obvious: “I’m more than 40 years old now and I’m starting to understand that sometimes life is hard.” Wow!…a mind reader.

Fast forward to January, 2012.  I’m crafting this message mid-air returning from a guys’ golf trip in Naples, Florida.  My “friends” score just got a booster shot.  Seven red-blooded males battled over $20 bills on the skinny fairways of Naples National Golf Club. It’s wickedly difficult in a way that makes golf-lovers smile extra wide.

Gotta love a state of the art, Aston Martin Rapide.

We also ogled over Maseratis, Ferraris and one particular Aston Martin which drew intense envy.  We stayed out way too late, laughed at octogenarian disco-dancers, drank one too many Tequila shots and freely absorbed the Florida sun.  We might need a vacation to recover from our vacation.

The most satisfying part of the boondoggle was the reassurance of knowing we share many of the same joys and challenges.  Everyone has a story about where they came from, where they are today and where they are going.  We’re all in love with our families, proud of what we have overcome and motivated by what’s ahead.  With friends at the center, we shared fitness, fun and finances – and stories about family, faith and future.  A Seven Fs clean sweep.

Yes, sometimes life is hard.  But as long as the sun rises the next day, our friends will give us a ‘mulligan’ on the first tee.

Good leaders protect the time to relax, get away and soak up positive energy from people they admire. It doesn’t have to be Naples National — Starbucks or Perkins works too.  Friends have a way of energizing one another.

Please join me in congratulating the 2012 golfing Grand Champion, Phil.  Happy Birthday to Dominski, and thanks to Mr. Koch for making it happen again this year.  And the Oscar goes to my wife Melinda for encouraging me to go again this year.

Drop me a note: how are you generating your personal positive energy these days?

Betty White turns 90 years old today. She is redefining what ‘old means.’  My grandmother was a “Betty White” in many ways. When my grandmother — Arlene Hunter — turned 90 years old, she set a goal of memorizing one Chopin Etude per month on the piano. (Chopin Etudes are widely recognized as some of the most rigorous technical pieces of the modern era.  He wrote them in the 1830s to teach the modern techniques necessary to perform the finest pieces in the world.  The 27 Etudes are the cornerstones for professional concert pianists.)

Granted, my grandmother was an accomplished musician; opera singer, school music teacher and piano instructor.  But Chopin Etudes at 90?  She was retired, widowed, living alone and building a strategy to get the most out of last chapter in her life.  Her physique was consistent with rural Iowa women.  But her mind was as sharp as a New York Times columnist.  Her spirit was Ferrari red.  Why not set an audacious goal to accomplish on the piano what most twenty-something aspiring musicians do while pursuing a Masters in piano?  She learned, and memorized all 27, and lived 13 more years.  That’s Betty White air.

So, what are you working on?  Human beings were meant to work hard and build things.  We find joy in dreaming, purpose in the pursuit and meaning when building things. That’s what builds character.  People admire and follow character.

Me?  I’m learning to enjoy improving my fitness (dropped 4 pounds last week!)  I’m teaching 30 kids the music to a church play.  I’m building a coaching and publishing business.  I’m finding mental toughness and focus in my golf game.  I’m accepting all the people, speed bumps, ups and downs in my life as a gift — grateful for how they make me who I am today.  Through more than 25 years of coaching leaders, I’ve learned one of the most rewarding questions to ask is:  What are you working on?

The Spring 2012 Good Leadership Breakfast begins February 17, 2012.  The theme is Personal and Professional Planning.  You’ll hear great stories from good leaders who are always working on something good!  Watch for your registration email tomorrow, or visit the site now and sign-up one day early!

So…What’s your Chopin Etude?  What are you working on that brings you joy, purpose and meaning?  Good leaders wake up every day with a vision for how the work they have on their plates today, makes them the person they want to be when they grow up.

Drop me a note: what are you working on?

The New Year passed 10 days ago.  Did you use the turn of the calendar as an opportunity to ask this important question?   Are you getting ahead, or falling behind?

We all have expectations about what we wanted in our lives by ‘what age.’  Some wear those expectations on their sleeves, others bury them in their souls.  Most people credit friends and family for shaping them…others point out intimate conversations with Good Leaders who opened their eyes to new possibilities.

I’m so pleased to announce the Good Leadership Breakfast for 2012. Your intense interest and strong words of encouragement were too much to ignore. So, we have a wonderful dance-card  to stretch your vision of what’s possible for you.

Our Spring 2012 Series will feature speakers centered around the theme Personal and Professional Planning; embracing and celebrating the Seven Fs; Faith, Family, Finances, Fitness, Friends, Fun and Future.

February 17: Dave Kansas, COO of American Public Media, will share his story: “How the arts made me the leader I  am today.”

March 16: Sam Richter, best selling author and founder of Know More, will share his thoughts on: “How genuine appreciation can grow your life and career.”

April 27: Scott Anderson, CEO of Patterson Companies, will share his personal insights: “Why the learning never stops, a glimpse into my development journey.”

May 18: Sue Mulkern, CHRO of Optum Health, will share: “How my personal convictions help shape work/life wellness at Optum Health.”

Again this year, Minnesota Valley Country Club is our home.  You’ll find a wonderful breakfast buffet, compelling networking and extraordinary food for thought around the Seven Fs.  This year we are proud to announce Minnesota Business magazine as our media sponsor, The Discovery Forum and Thrivent Financial for Lutherans as our Series Sponsors.

Tickets will go on sale Tuesday, January 17 — and will be limited to the first 100 people registered for each breakfast.

Good leaders go out of their way to expand their horizons — personally and professionally. We hope you consider joining us for the Good Leadership Breakfast — it’s the place where Good Leaders get together with good intentions, to make great things possible!

Now, back to our premise: drop me a quick note and tell me…are you getting ahead, or falling behind — I’d love to know why.  Seize the day!

Don’t you just love the holiday feasts?  There are very few things I enjoy more than eating and drinking with reckless abandon over the holidays.  When wine is freely flowing and the air is pregnant with temptation, it feels great to grab that extra scoop of cheesy potatoes.  Or eat apple pie for breakfast.   Don’t you think it’s proper to fully absorb the loving spoonfuls prepared by people we love? It’s only once a year, right? Here’s a seldom quoted truism:  once we get past the age of 30, the average American gains one pound per year through age 70.  Hmmm…how could one pound a year make that big of a difference?  Let’s see, I weighed 148 pounds when I got married 25 years ago, and maintained that weight until I was about 30.  Today, 18 years later the scandalous scale in my bathroom smirks “168 pounds” at me.  18 years, 20 pounds.  Ouch.  Maybe I didn’t notice because I think of  myself as tall, dark and handsome?

Here's what 20 pounds in 18 years looks like

When writing the book: What Really Works, Blending the Seven Fs for the Life You Imagine, Tim Schmidt and I discovered many inspiring Fitness stories.  He wrote most of the Fitness chapter, and alas, he started working out more and eating less.  Today, he certainly looks a lot more like Adonis than I do…he’s arrested the culturally-accepted one-pound-per-year thing. So, today I sit here pondering my options.  Two days ago, most people made some sort of New Year’s Resolution — it’s no surprise that “I’m going to lose weight” is the most ridiculed cliché of the resolution ritual.  The Today Show says so.  I feel great…but do I have the character to arrest the slide? As God as my witness (and a couple thousand people who read this blog) I’m going to arrest the one pound a year accumulation this year. That means I will need to embrace the only thing that really works: commit to the Code RED lifestyle. To quote our own book: maintaining a fit and healthy body requires what we’ve dubbed “Code RED”: reduction, education, and discipline. As our survey research mounted, these three themes kept emerging as definitive success factors to fitness. For example, a recent major study provided one recipe for cutting your risk of diabetes, heart attack, stroke, or cancer by 78 percent. The recipe? Avoid smoking, exercise three to four days per week; maintain a body mass index less than thirty; and eat a diet favoring fruits, vegetables, and whole grains. Hmm…I don’t recall many fruits, vegetables (without cheese) and whole grains over the holidays (unless Apple Pie counts.)  I’m not a smoker, so that’s good.  But I haven’t learned to enjoy exercise.  Is that possible?

Good leaders look into the mirror, and accept the brutal realities (humilities?).  And they take commit the time and effort to create positive change.

OK friends…unite!  Let’s seize the day and arrest the one-pound-per-year blubberfest.  I have to get better at my Fitness, because I’ve just agreed to become a columnist for Faith and Fitness Magazine!  Seriously. How are you feeling about your Fitness today?  Better yet, think about how we can help each other…send me a reply with your ideas and lets get started.

Winter in Rice Park, St. Paul, Minnesota

Rice park sparkled like a Disney movie…an evening fit for a Prince and Princess.

Every grown father and daughter will attest to difficulties of maintaining a healthy, harmonious teenage father/daughter relationship….rarely Prince and Princess!

However, the recent Anna & Paul Batz Daddy Daughter Date Night was a Seven Fs clean sweep — blending faith, family, finances, fitness, friends, fun and future.

Last week, Anna Mary Batz accepted my formal invitation for a fancy evening of dinner and theater in historic, magical downtown St. Paul, Minnesota.  (Readers of the What Really Works book, will recognize Daddy Daughter Date Night as one of our most celebrated Success Habits.)

Cinderella is special to us.  Our family is uber-musical…we’ve been labeled the Von Batz Family Singers by affectionate fans in our church.  It comes honestly: my grandmother sang with the Chicago Opera and my mother still teaches music to this day.  My children have grown up on the piano bench, singing Disney and Broadway songs as I play the piano.  For us, the music is a faith builder, stress buster, and generation blender.

Anna as Cinderella, with the Von Batz Family Singers, 2009

Anna was born with my grandmother’s voice.  It’s wonderful, but not always easy. Adolescent girls these days spend most of their energy trying to fit in.  The moment she realized the gift was special was when she was cast as “Cinderella” in Cinderella.  She got the big part as a lowly 7th grader, who quickly became public enemy #1 by the 8th grade girls.

But, alas, when she sat still on center stage and sang “In my Own Little Corner”…the 8th grade girls understood.

Rice park sparkled like a Disney movie…a perfect evening for Daddy Daughter Date Night.  Over dinner, my Cinderella and I dreamed about where she might go to college.  We gazed with admiration over the Princess and Prince we’ve both become.  We talked about 16-year old girl problems.  And dreams for her future.  We talked about 48 year old Prince problems.  And dreams for his future.

Dinner was $96.  Cinderella tickets, $208.  Sharing cheesecake and decaf during intermission was luxurious…the dance through sparkling Rice Park with her arm around mine was priceless.

We’re all working on the relationships that are important to us.  Personally and professionally.  We’re all prince and princess one moment — and difficult teenagers the next.  That’s why it’s important to take personal responsibility to create the moment to connect with the people who count in our lives.

Good leaders understand take personal responsibility to build strong, resilient relationship with people who count in our lives.

What Cinderella in your life – personally or professionally – needs your invitation to dance?

Seize the day.

It was the kiss on the cheek that got me.  Twice.

Yes, winter is here…the Minneapolis temperatures are hovering around 20 degrees F.  Daylight has been rapidly decreasing and we’re definitely cocooning against the intense cold.  Very few people would describe the onset of winter as happy. (Especially the golfers.)

And yet the buzz right now is brightly positive and happy.  Can you feel it?  There’s something magical about the days sandwiched between Thanksgiving and the New Year.  Even the most routine business meetings have an extra happy intensity.  In the traditional mix of personal/professional “How are you doing?” questions…we spend more time on the “personal” side.  Over breakfast last week, my most intense get-to-the-point client stopped to ask about my holiday plans.  And he actually listened to my answer. When I asked him…he actually answered, and he smiled.  We both were both just a little bit more happy than usual.

But it was the two kisses on the cheek that caused me to write this note.  Twice in 24 hours, two different business women ended a warm hug with a quick, very professional peck on my cheek.  Seriously, I’m not that handsome.  And I don’t have anything extra to give this year.  But I will admit, both conversations were happy — we spent most of our discussion on the personal side, counting our blessings and thinking ahead about our holiday plans.  Happiness. Warm hug. Kiss on the cheek.

Darn it!  Why aren’t we this happy all year round?  Our own experience will tell us that within a couple weeks, cocooning after the New Year typically causes the opposite affect.  The nasty stuff in the daily news we ignore during the holidays starts to make a more caustic impression on our lives. And the cold is colder.

Just to be clear, I’m not asking for a peck on the cheek from every warm business meeting hug.  But I do think we can help one another stay grateful and happier as a part of our daily, non-holiday routine.

Here’s my favorite strategy for lively, happier conversations: instead of asking “How are you doing?” why not ask: “What are you doing for fun these days?” Fun is one of the most powerful Seven Fs — when we are having lots of fun, the other Fs (Faith, Family, Finances, Fitness, Friends and Future) seem to be more lively in our life. It is especially powerful if lots of your fun comes through your work.

What ideas do you have to share about how to help us all stay happier all year round?  I would love to share them.

Lucky me, back stage with Amy Grant

Most of the responses have been remarkable.  Within the past year, I’ve received a myriad of replies to my Tuesday morning blogs.  Right now, I’m recalling the bountiful advice on things to do in Hawaii.  And, the guy in Southern California who provided the best tattoo idea – he’s considering inking the word “believe” as his personal and professional brand statement.  I got some “atta boy” messages for this picture with Amy Grant…and, better yet, last week I received an “I appreciate you” message as a result of our Bucket of Goodwill commitment via the Good Leadership Breakfast.  Now I look forward to Tuesday mornings.

Blogging is exciting and scary at the same time.  But, alas, I’m an ‘author’ and many authors these days sharpen their saws by committing to a consistent blogging cadence.  The consistent commitment to Tuesday morning blogs is one of the ways my life has opened up this year.  And it’s been a compelling learning experience.  My growing edge.

Blogs are different than books: books look good on the shelf and feel really good in your hands.  Blogs fly around in uncontrolled flight patterns on the internet…and blogs talk back!  By now, you know that I write directly and indirectly about leadership and the Seven Fs: faith, family, finances, fitness, friends, fun and future. Some of the comments that come back to me sting, some cause me to say “huh?” and others simply make me glad I continue to be a blogger.

Recently one of my blogs hit a very popular blog site: EO.  Click here to read what I had to say about Entrepreneurs and The Seven Fs.

Seth Godin is my favorite blogger. He’s become a celebrity blogger/speaker/author by thoughtfully engaging throngs of leaders and entrepreneurs.  Seth Godin is a business-media Rock Star, on the same scale as Elton or Springsteen.  Maybe, just maybe…with your help…we can build a movement around the Seven Fs that would compel Seth Godin to mention me in one of his blogs.  Now that would really be opening up.

I think I’ll start by sending him an “I appreciate you” message today.  Anyone have a connection with Seth they can share with me?

Its hard to miss the brilliant red Handy Paint Pails at the center of each round table.  Mark Bergman’s invention is turning the painting industry upside down.  Recently, the “Walmart of Japan” picked up the product…recognizing how valuable this tool will be, as good people brighten up a bad situation.

Good leaders understand that to give, is to receive — its the original concept of ‘leverage.’  At the Good Leadership Breakfast, we call Bergman’s invention “The Bucket of Goodwill,” and we use it as our own day brightener.  This year, more than 600 participants attended 9 events at Minnesota Valley Country Club.  Our purpose is to provide an invigorating leadership development experience for people who do not have the benefit of a corporate plan.  We believe that everyone is teetering on the edge of something extraordinary…and when good leaders, get together with good intentions, we make great things possible!  So far, that’s meant lots of good.

One the breakfast series rituals is for participants to reach deep into their pockets.  We ask for a healthy cash donation into the Bucket of Goodwill, accompanied by a business card.  At the end of each meeting, the speaker draws a name out of the bucket — the winner has the obligation to donate the proceeds from the buckets to their favorite charity.  That’s cool…but here’s the best part: the inventor of the Handy Paint Pail matches the donations.  This past year our good leaders have donated $3277, which has been matched by Bergman.

Mark Bergman is a good leader who is making great things possible.  How are you celebrating good leadership?

Katie Batz, Paul Batz and Tim Schmidt signing books for college students! Thanks to the Mocha Monkey for hosting.

Cliff Claven is working overtime these days, lugging boxes of books about The Seven Fs to college campuses – generously paid for by people like you.  (Cliff Claven is the mailman who occupied the left side of the bar on the TV series “Cheers!”)

February 3, 2011 was a big day for Tim Schmidt and me.  Three hundred of our closest friends gathered together at the Metropolitan Ballroom to celebrate the launch of our first book: What Really Works.  With the pop of a champagne cork, we introduced the world to the concept of “Blending the Seven Fs:” Faith, Family, Finances, Fitness, Friends, Fun and Future, for a satisfying work/life. The highlight of the evening was one very generous soul bidding $900 for a signed copy of the first book off the press.  The money went to charity and that’s where the giving around the Seven Fs began.

That same evening, Tim and I proudly extended our own offer:  “If you buy a copy of our new book, we will give one to a college senior at the school of your choice.”  And that’s where Cliff Claven joined the picture.

By Thanksgiving time, more than 400 books will have been distributed to college Presidents near and far.  On your behalf, we are asking 56 college presidents to give books to college seniors who are good leaders – the type of people who we want to shape our retirement era!

For Tim and me, the book signing party was a full sweep of all of the Seven Fs:

• Faith: by giving away 10% of the books we sold, we are tithing, reinforcing our commitment to stewardship.
• Family: the book signing party was held at Mocha Monkey, an artsy coffee shop and restaurant, owned by Tim and Jeanette’s son Jonathan.  And Katie Batz (Melinda and my second child) organized the ‘you buy one, we will give one away’ campaign.
• Finances: the fact that we could give away so many books, means the first printing was a success!  The book is profitable, and we are working on the second edition.
• Fitness: lugging 400+ books up and down the stairs is good cardio…
• Friends: nothing could be more satisfying than producing such a meaningful project with a good friend –we look forward to growing our friendship as we spread the good word about the Seven Fs across the land.
• Fun: book signings are a blast!  Inspiring conversations with new book-buyers makes the process joyful.
• Future: introducing young leaders to the concept of living a life of faith, family, finances, fitness, friends, fun and future is very satisfying.

Now, here’s your chance: holiday gift-giving is just around the corner.  Please think of someone that you believe would appreciate a copy of this terrific little book.  Log on to www.sevenfs.com or visit Amazon.com – because it just feels so darn good to give.

What 'mark' would you choose to articulate your personal/professional brand?

People-watching is an insatiable craving in my life.  People are beautiful, compelling and fascinating.  With willing eyes and an open mind, we have so much to learn about how people choose to make their mark.

While walking the beaches of Maui, Melinda and I were fascinated by an overwhelming wave of people who made the decision to decorate themselves with a tattoo.  I guess that shouldn’t be too much of a surprise…people on the beaches of Maui walk around mostly uncovered – if you have a tattoo, Kaanapali Beach is a fitting showcase.

Once I started looking closely, I started to wonder…what does a tattoo really mean?  And how does one choose the artwork?  Seriously!  Choosing the art for a tattoo is personal/professional branding statement that lasts forever.  From my Midwestern, white suburban male perspective — that’s a decision that would not be taken lightly.

Over the course of one three mile beach walk, I saw the full spectrum of tattoo art: from the “Corona Extra” logo to the predictable skull and crossbones.  From a Rebel flag to a dragon.  Countless flowers and crosses and barbed wire.  I met one guy with the triad of the New York Yankees, Buddha, and the United States flag tattooed across his shoulders and chest.  I found full-bodied mosaics to be fascinating, and messages about I love [name] to be intriguing.  One guy had the entire skyline of Louisville Kentucky across his back – his female companion had a Bob Marley collage extending across her back under her left armpit across to her belly.  It got me wondering…does she like Bob Marley more than Louisville?

All of those marks say something about the person who carries them.  On a Snorkeling cruise, I asked some people the “What does your tattoo mean?” question.  I got two answers: either “I thought is was fun!” or the image had a deep, powerful meaning that motivated them to make it their ‘mark.’  My brother-in-law Earl has the later: on his left shoulder is a beautiful Native American-inspired circle to honor his fallen son Tate, who died in childbirth.  The mark was designed by his wife – Tate’s mother, who is also my sister.

Earl’s tattoo helps me see the tattoo phenomenon with fresh eyes and a curious soul.  We’re all trying to do good work on this earth, and we’re all intending to leave a mark on some small piece of the human race.

What would your mark be?  Maybe its about faith, or fun, or both!  Where would you like that brand to appear on your person?  What would it say about you, and why?

Melinda is considering a flower on her ankle…I’m considering some “fun sun art” on my shoulder.  We’ve threatened to make this our 50^th birthday ritual.  What would that say about us?  About me or her?  I’m not sure…but I’m finding the process of mulling over a ‘mark’ of my own to be as inspiring as the beaches of Maui.

Have you pondered your ‘mark’ lately?  Good leaders understand the message they are trying to say in word, deed and pictures.

Please respond with what tattoo you would consider or already have….what and why?